Do you remember your first kiss?

Do you remember your first kiss?
Do you remember your first kiss?

Monday, 26 March 2012

Strike Me Down!!

Frank Skinner recently hosted a talk show on BBC2 called “Opinionated” where celebrity guests and a studio audience would discuss news events of the preceding week.  One week Frank called on a member of the studio audience, who was a noted atheist, to make a comment about a news item.  The atheist duly commented, and Frank’s response was unsurprising, given his staunch Catholic convictions. He said “What gets me about Atheists, is that although they’re quite happy to deny the existence of God, if you ever ask them to hold their arms up to the sky and shout “God –If you exist, prove it by striking me down now!”  they never take you up on your offer!  Is this because they’re hedging their bets?”

Well, this was like a red rag to a bull to me.  As a staunch atheist, could I do this?

After a few days, and, plucking up all my courage whilst in the middle of walking my dog in the park on a Monday evening, I raised both arms skyward, and said, in quite a loud voice “God! If you exist, then strike me down - now!”  As you all  must have guessed, nothing happened because a) I’m typing this right now, and b) there’s no such thing as God.  

Ok “Big deal” I can hear you saying.   However what I found hard to get over was that this is indeed a big deal.  Certainly for me.  It was something I could only do after thinking about the act for a great deal of time.  It certainly wasn’t something I could do easily and without a second thought. And – I’ve figured out why this is so  – it is because of the sheer mass of indoctrination that bombards us all from a very early age, that God does exist and that he is all knowing, and more importantly, all seeing.  I know  that this is not true – just a myth dreamt up by some clever people a  few thousand years ago, but that myth pervades because of its constant repetition and reinforcement by so many people when you are young and impressionable.  I’m very confident that there’s no such thing as God – indeed I’ve been confident of that since I was 16, but – it’s still difficult to throw your arms in the air and deny his existence.  It just shows the power of propaganda.  I know absolutely, in my heart of hearts that having spoken, nothing is going to strike me down, but that insidious propaganda – religion – just causes that tiny little niggle in the back of your mind that says “are you certain you know what you’re doing?”

Nevertheless – I’ve now said it – more than once – and feel liberated.  So f*ck you, Frank Skinner!

Wednesday, 4 January 2012

The day I renounced rampant consumerism

I'm reminded of the time when I renounced rampant consumerism, because of Christmas. It's an apt reminder and an apt time of the year, so I'm happy to share it with you all.

Back in 1995, cable was being laid all over our town. Leaflets were regularly pushed through our door telling us about the benefits of cable television and promising instant access to many new TV channels. Dates were promised about when the service would go live. I contacted the company (Birmingham Cable) and made an appointment for the rep to visit us (a necessity if you wanted to sign up). The rep duly arrived and got me all excited with his promises of new channels, clearer signal, and no need for an aerial. He said, that if I signed the DD that minute, he could get the necessary cabling work completed before Christmas, so that we could see all these new channels over the Xmas period. Wow, was I excited! All this for only £10 per month! (plus another £10 a month to shift my line rental from BT to cable).

Men came and dug up our garden. A cable was duly laid to our lounge. Another man successfully installed a box under our TV, and carried out all the necessary wiring. All this was completed by December 20th. I was so looking forward to this Xmas! A Christmas with 42 channels! Not just the 4 that I'd become used to, but 42!

Well, I'm going to cut a very long story short here by pointing out something that dawned on me by New Year's day. Xmas was no different whether you had 4 channels or 42! Basically what we had was 4 channels churning out the usual (newish, generally watchable) Christmas fayre, and the other 38 churning out complete and utter tripe - repeats, repeats of repeats, American repeats, repeats of old American shows that I certainly would never have watched the first time they came around and more old, old American films than even I could count. And 100s and 100s of advertisements. Complete and utter rubbish. Taught me a great lesson - more does not equal better. In fact more choice generally leads to a dumbing down of standards, so more in effect, means less. I cancelled the 38 channels on the 2nd January (had to pay for another 6 months as I was locked into a contract) but realised that consuming more is definitely worse than consuming less. Consumerism - yuk!

I now consume as little as possible, especially on the TV front.

Wednesday, 14 December 2011

I HATE PLASTIC BAGS!

It's time for me to have a good rant again.
I HATE PLASTIC BAGS!
I ALSO DISLIKE PEOPLE WHO GO OUT OF THEIR HOUSE WITH THE FULL INTENTION OF GOING SHOPPING, WHO DON'T TAKE SOME FORM OF CARRIER BAG(S) WITH THEM!

Why do people do this? Plastic bags are not biodegradable and lead to needless waste. Each house has hundreds of used plastic bags in it. When my wife and I go shopping (to Tesco, to our eternal shame) we always take 4 or 5 strong, durable carrier bags with us to pack our groceries in. (These durable bags have SAINSBURYS written on them in large letters, which gives me some perverse pleasure!). 
Other people in our check out queue have no bags with them at all! I feel like saying to them "When you got ready to go shopping, WHY DID YOU NOT PACK BAGS? YOU MUST HAVE A HOUSEFUL OF THEM!" My wife prevails on me to keep quiet, but it is very difficult.

In Wales, on October 1st 2011, the Welsh Assembly introduced a piece of legislation calling for all retailers to charge all customers 5p for each bag that they dispense, when shoppers purchase. The income goes back to the state as tax. The transformation has been instantaneous and massive! Everyone now carries a carrier bag in their handbag or pocket. By October 7th, the population of Wales had changed its collective psyche about carrying bags with them! How marvellous! Why can't legislaters bring such legislation about in England?

I will write to my MP today.

Monday, 5 December 2011

Moron performs acupuncture on "The Earth"

I've seen and heard many things on this wonderful planet that we live on but I never thought I would see anyone exhibit such craven stupidity as to attempt to perform acupuncture (a questionable treatment, even on humans) on the Earth itself. Truly this man's imbecility knows no bounds.


Quote - "I need to ask the water line if it's willing for me to heal it!"


Thursday, 3 November 2011

King of Comedians

I love comedy.  Ever since I was small I have enjoyed watching comedy and the skill of the comedian.  I love comedians from many eras, from Tommy Cooper and Eric Morecambe, to Peter Kaye and Ricky Jervais.  I still laugh out loud when I watch episodes of the Morecambe and Wise Christmas show from the early 70s, and when I watch “Whatever Happened to the Likely Lads” with Rodney Bewes and James Bolam.  I used to fall about laughing at Dave Allen, Billy Connelly and Jasper Carrott.  I once saw Cannon and Ball live in Coventry in the early 80s and almost had to be carried out of the auditorium because I was laughing so much.    Tears ran down my cheeks when I saw Victoria Wood perform (on piano) “Lets Do It”, the ballad of Barry & Frieda.  Has there ever been a better line than   “Be mighty, be flighty, Come and melt the buttons on me flameproof nightie!”     Julie Walters caused me apoplexy when I saw her “Ready to order, Sir?” sketch on the Wood and Walters show.  Eddie Izzard’s stand-up routines still cause me to laugh uncontrollably, especially when he performs the “drilling cats” sketch.  Oh, yes – I love comedy – from Ronnie Barker to Russell Brand, they all make me laugh and make me want more.  

 However – there is one comedian that, for me, stands head and shoulders above all of these.  Recently on a train journey to Leeds I listened to his “Derek & Clive” album on my mp3 player, and, despite having heard it 100 times before, was still spluttering with laughter, even before we had left New Street station, much to the amusement of other passengers.

This particular comedian was born 74 years ago this very month, and died young (as do many comedians) at the tender age of 57 in 1995.  For anyone interested to know more, click on the link below...

Friday, 28 October 2011

Harold Camping Makes Complete Asshole of Himself (Again)

    
For Harold Camping, Friday’s rapture wasn’t exactly what he expected.
As far as I know, God’s wrath didn’t destroy the universe entirely.
Camping’s predictions for the apocalypse may not have brought death and destruction to the world, but rather to his career and the legitimacy of Family Radio, Camping’s radio network.
I can’t possibly fathom how individuals of any faith could manage to take Camping or his organization seriously after the four failed predictions by the 90-year-old Christian broadcaster, whose math skills may have dwindled with age when it comes to predicting apocalypses.
Camping’s lunacy first became evident in 1988, when he first predicted that the world would be engulfed in chaos.
If I, for one, were ever to predict the destruction of the world as we know it, I’d be awfully ashamed if it turned out to be untrue.
But one strike didn’t stop Camping, or his second failed prediction in 1994 or the supposed apocalypse earlier this year on May 21, which received significant attention.
After the prediction for an apocalypse this past Friday, I don’t understand how Camping isn’t ashamed of himself for his never-ending nonsense.
The real shame is the man has had Family Radio at his fingertips to advocate his ideas, because without the medium, his predictions would seem more like senility in his old age. The only thing that sets him apart from your average homeless apocalypse prophet seems to be his radio station, and the millions of dollars available to post warnings of the Rapture on thousands of billboards throughout America.
The troubling part with Camping’s predictions is that individuals have actually taken this mad prophet seriously in the past, and several suicides and deaths resulted from his prediction in May.
Yet despite the multiple deaths caused by the prediction earlier this year, Camping continued to work on his math for the date of the rapture as if he simply botched the equation, which deals with numbers that symbolize atonement, completeness and heaven; variables that any mathematician could approve of.
Camping justified his latest prediction on the Family Radio YouTube video for Friday’s apocalypse, citing the May 21 prediction as the beginning of a five-month judgment period.
“Indeed, on May 21 Christ did come spiritually to put all of the unsaved throughout the world into judgment. But that universal judgment will not be physically seen until the last day of the five-month judgment period, on October 21, 2011,” the description said.
The only judgment that should have been made in the past five months is that this old man is completely off his rocker.
Hopefully, we’ll only have to endure the 2012 Mayan calendar’s supposed prediction of the end of the world once.
E-mail the author: David Oltean

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Monday, 3 October 2011

Science saved my soul.... from religion

This video is truly amazing. Set aside 15 minutes and watch it in all its beauty... 
If you have any questions about the meaning of life, then watch and all will be revealed...